Had a damn restless day in sch. After having a pathetic structure 1 quiz(it is easy! but i fumbled..so pissed with myself!), i couldnt pay attention to any lecture. Had this stupid hols mood. I walked out of lecture halfway. Shocked ShaoQi.. cos i never skip lecture half way.. but today i grew impatient .. so i walked off.. went to canteen to take a break, before gg back to structure.. where i was not paying attention.

Why! Dunno.. any way, feeling very disappointed with myself. Anyone who make a mistake, i can still bear with it, but not me(if without a valid reason). Think i have been to demanding with myself in all aspect. I am not a perfectionist. But i request myself to hit certain mark in my life. Maybe the mark is too high. i couldnt catch up with myself anymore, i felt. I felt so lagged behind with my demanding self.

And my pessimistic self makes things worse. A demoralised troop loses battle, and that applies to me too.. i am losing this battle.. i couldnt uphold my principles.

I know i am not the worst off person ard. cos there r others who r worse off.. but then those who r worse off will also think that they r not the worst off. And so, i may become the worst off in their mind. Wat a cycle.

But then, my problems onli i myself can solve and understand fully. so no pt telling it to u guys.
But then , no prob one la.. life still goes on, and there r still so many pretty gers ard to be admired.. Oops..
anyway, there r Jc gers in sch recently. Hmm.. ok out of topic here.

Well, i received some complaints of a fren from a fren. That fren complained abt the fren. And i feel so great when someone holds a similar view as me. Cos i also feel like complaining of the fren. Thanks, that fren, i feel so glad that i am not suffering alone.

Haha, well, well, break is coming. Not having a too pessimistic feeling here

, neither do i hold an optimistic one. So weird.